Friday, January 8, 2010

Snow day

And I am about to be as big as Frosty.
Why is it that when there is a small dusting of snow on the ground, roads close up and I am stuck in doors with two small children and a bag of Doritos?

No meat consumed but Doritos...yes, I ate my weight in Doritos.
No one said I was perfect.

However, if it gets me out of jail with the diet police...even for just a moment, I have ran at least a mile around my house while chasing my two year old and have lifted at least 40 plus pounds carrying various children around to either bed, potty or on one occasion the first aid kit.

Its days like these when I realize how much I really REALLY need the gym. Being left alone at home with these two, all while trying to work is making my brain hurt. I would love an hour to reboot...except the roads are "ice" and I cannot go anywhere.

Tonight we will be having seafood gumbo. I vowed that while I may give up meat, seafood does not count. It does to those Skinny Bitches (please read book for reference) but to least not yet.

They also said that I should only drink organic wine but I am not sure that Boone's is very organic.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Meat free for me...

If you know me from back in my college days, the title of this post may make you laugh. I chuckled.


So I made a goal to be meatless for a week. So far so good. I am not jumping on some vegetarian band wagon and making claims that being a meat eater is super unhealthy. I am just seeing if I can accomplish a small goal, one that takes work and discipline.

Just putting it out there, if you know of any good meat substitutes please send them my way.

I have tried and liked:
Boca Crumbles - I have heard that the Morningstar brand is better though
Morningstar maple sausage - YUM-O
Boca chicken nuggets - yum

Today I am tasking an organic cheese, rice and bean burrito made with soy cheese. We shall see.

So I tried on my goal pants and dress the other night. Both "fit", not well but both did zip. MAJOR muffin top with the pants and the dress gave me a uni-boob but I know where I stand know so at least I know what I am working for. Also, at least I know that the goal is not totally off the table.

The big 30 is coming up in April and I am hoping to be wearing the pants for the big party my husband is probably going to throw for me. Again, if you know me you will know that this is also chuckle worthy. But, a night out on the town may be in order and these pants WILL FIT...AND LOOK GOOD. Its not like they are crazy pants. Pink pants...but I love them, always have and hate the fact that I cannot wear them.

I will be joining the gym next week. I hate starting new places alone but I need to do it. I have such a fear of walking into the gym, to a machine and getting on it when I don't have a partner or friend to talk to. I mean, gyms are such social things. There is a way to proceed when entering a gym, especially small ones. Then, what if the machine that I want is in use...which typically always happens to me. It is always being used by some crazy, healthy girl who can go HOURS on it. I feel the need to just tap her and say, "Do you mind letting me use this really quickly. I mean, just look at me, it won't be more than 15 minutes. Thanks" So then I am stuck on some lame stationary bike WAITING for the machine I really want.

But hey, a stationary bike is better than what I have been doing, which is NOTHING.

Bridesmaid dress shopping is starting in March. I have two months to get it in gear enough to not be totally embarrassed during that.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Skinny Bitch

Okay, so after a year of having the book collecting dust on my bookshelf I finally read it, cover to cover yesterday. I even endured the horrible pages about animal abuse for meat production.

So, lets be realistic...I probably will not become a vegan; although they really push the issue hard in Skinny Bitch. I live with a meat eating husband who in all likelyhood could be told he will die tomorrow if he eats one more hamburger and will go to the Five Guys and buy himself two. Also, I sort of like meat but after reading the Skinny Bitch book I can say, I will give meat up for a month...starting soon...I promise. But really, I will...promise.
However, vegan is another story. I mean, this limits EVERYTHING and to be honest with you and myself I am not ready to make the full commitment. Baby steps. Meatless first, vegan next...right?!?!

So, about you know I just had a baby and I am not sure how much weight I gained during that nine month eating for two phase. I do know that since I had my daughter I have lost 30 lbs. That was 6 weeks ago. Good right? Sure and I am happy about that. I attribute this to the fact that my metabolism kicked into gear for those 6 weeks but at the rate I am going it is going to slow back down to its steady crawl very, very soon. To loose 30 lbs in 6 weeks and still be fat is BAD. I have a LONG way to go, but in the past I always looked at the end number. The end number is a big one and hard to wrap my head around. Therefore, I am doing this in increments of 3's...meaning 30 lbs at a time. If I can loose another 30 lbs to be honest I will be happy. Top another 30 on top of that and I will be ecstatic!!!

I hate the scale. I know it is a necessary evil of weight loss but really, I hate it. It depresses me to the point that I want to take hostages. So, I take my weight loss by size...more or less the clothes that continue to sit in my closet for years unworn because I cannot zip them. This year, I will wear them because at this point two kids later I do not have the money to always buy a new wardrobe every season. I need to use what I have.

I have a goal dress and a goal pair of pants. I will not lie, both of these articles are still in the double digits, and not in the low end of the doubles either but have a 1 in front and not a 2. Both of these articles are spring and summer items and I think are appropriate goals that I can reach. I am not expecting to loose another 30 lbs by March but I think I can handle something by May...right?

Another goal...the dreaded Bridesmaid dress. One of my besties is getting married in October and by the emails of dresses that she has sent I will be placed on the end, in the back, behind the wall if I look the way I do in the dress that she picks out. This is her day and nothing looks worse than a fatty next to some pretty girls in plum colored dresses.

As a mom of two I need some me time. Not a lot, just an hour, three times a week. So, I resolve to get to the gym at least three days a week to work out on some gym equipment. I am not a fan of classes...I hate the peppy instructors but if I can plug my iPod into my ears and zone out for an hour I will be a much better person to my children, my husband, coworkers, friends...myself.

I have a lot of work ahead of me. I know. I am hoping that this blog will keep me honest. I have been fat for most if not all of my life. I am tired of it and I am tired of hating summer because I have nothing to wear. I need to be outside enjoying things with my kids.
Plus, I hate to be vain but I think my children deserve a good looking mommy. I had one and they need one too. Kids are cruel and before I know it they will be on the playground having to hear "Your momma's so fat jokes" and that is just sad.

Okay, I can do this!